The Highs, Lows, and Absolute No-Shows


Week 3 brought us everything from unstoppable MVP performances to teams that forgot how football works. Josh Jacobs ran through defenders like he was auditioning for Fast and Furious: NFL Edition, racking up nearly 30 points for TheJackOfHarts, while Kyren Williams acted like the Rams were paying him in touchdowns, going off for 30.60 points. On the other hand, Rhamondre Stevenson must have thought the game was flag football—his 0.30 points didn’t exactly scream “effort.”

Dak Prescott tried to single-handedly rescue the Sunday Scaries with nearly 400 yards, but his team was more interested in participating in a game of hide-and-seek than football. Meanwhile, Nacua Matata’s squad was so non-existent that we’re sending out search parties. At least J. Daniels showed up to play… everyone else? Not so much.

Want to hear how a team could score over 130 points or how ChefJeff turned Brock Purdy into a fantasy monster? Week 3’s full recap has all the hilarity, heartbreak, and fantasy gold you need to prep for the chaos of Week 4.

Week 3 Recap: The Highs, Lows, and Absolute No-Shows

1. **Nacua Matata (Cuka) vs 1st Moody on Duty (TheJackOfHarts)**

   **Final Score: 50.66 – 96.92**

   **Top Players:**

     **Nacua Matata:** J. Daniels (QB – WAS): 28.06 points – 21/32 CMP, 254 YDS, 2 TD, 12 CAR, 39 YDS, 1 TD  

     **1st Moody on Duty:** J. Jacobs (RB – LV): 29.90 points – 25 CAR, 115 YDS, 2 TD, 3 REC, 25 YDS  

      **1st Moody on Duty:** A. Cooper (WR – CLE): 24.10 points – 7 REC, 116 YDS, 1 TD

Nacua Matata’s Week 3 can be summed up in three words: *completely didn’t show.* J. Daniels was the lone bright spot, heroically trying to make something out of nothing by throwing for two touchdowns and scrambling for another. But it was like trying to put out a house fire with a garden hose. The rest of his team? A complete ghost town. Meanwhile, TheJackOfHarts dominated from start to finish, led by a freight train in the form of Josh Jacobs. Jacobs ran over defenders like he was auditioning for a monster truck rally, and Amari Cooper played like a man possessed, burning DBs for 116 yards and a score. It was a brutal beatdown that left Cuka scrambling for answers—and maybe a team GPS, because they definitely didn’t show up to this game.

2. **Minnesota Vikings (AEssier) vs Sunday Scaries (Jhawkenson)**

   **Final Score: 119.44 – 92.56**

   **Top Players:**

     **Minnesota Vikings:** A. Rodgers (QB – NYJ): 21.04 points – 27/35 CMP, 281 YDS, 2 TD, 2 CAR, 18 YDS  

      **Minnesota Vikings:** R. Rice (WR – KC): 23.10 points – 1 CAR, 1 YD, 12/14 REC, 110 YDS, 1 TD  

     **Sunday Scaries:** D. Prescott (QB – DAL): 29.86 points – 28/51 CMP, 397 YDS, 2 TD, 2 CAR, 7 YDS, 1 TD

AEssier came into Week 3 on a mission, and boy, did he make sure everyone got the memo. Aaron Rodgers found his 2011 MVP form, throwing darts all game, while R. Rice emerged from the shadows to become a PPR cheat code, catching practically everything within a mile radius. It was like watching a well-oiled machine carve up a Thanksgiving turkey—clean and methodical. Jhawkenson’s Sunday Scaries put up a fight, with Dak Prescott doing everything he could, tossing for nearly 400 yards and adding two touchdowns. But with a performance like that from Dak, you’d think his team would have fared better. Unfortunately, the rest of his squad looked like they were auditioning for *Scared Straight* instead of playing football. The only thing scary about Sunday Scaries is how scared they should be of their Week 4 prospects.

3. **Hill’s Hush Money (SneakyMotives) vs ChefJeff**

  **Final Score: 85.84 – 123.28**

   **Top Players:**

     **Hill’s Hush Money:** S. Barkley (RB – NYG): 31.80 points – 17 CAR, 147 YDS, 1 TD, 2 PT CONV, 4 REC, 27 YDS  

     – **ChetJeff:** B. Purdy (QB – SF): 25.78 points – 22/30 CMP, 292 YDS, 3 TD, 1 CAR, 1 YD  

     – **ChetJeff:** D. Montgomery (RB – DET): 19.70 points – 23 CAR, 105 YDS, 1 TD, 1 REC, 7 YDS

Hill’s Hush Money had one shining star in Saquon Barkley, who put on an absolute show, running like he was trying to carry the Giants and SneakyMotives on his back. But when you’re the only one playing, there’s not much even Barkley can do. The rest of SneakyMotives’ team might as well have been sitting in the stands, munching on hot dogs. Jalen Hurts? He played like he was stuck in pre-season form. Meanwhile, ChetJeff didn’t just show up; he brought fireworks. Brock Purdy is slowly turning into an elite QB (seriously, who saw this coming?), tossing for 292 yards and 3 TDs. And when David Montgomery wasn’t busy bulldozing through defenders, he was racking up points. This one was over before it even started, and Hill’s Hush Money is going to need more than cash to fix this mess.

4. **38 Beavers vs MikeMac7** GAME OF THE WEEK

  **Final Score: 83.96 – 72.88**

   **Top Players:**

     **38 Beavers:** J. Burrow (QB – CIN): 25.36 points – 29/34 CMP, 324 YDS, 3 TD, 1 CAR, 4 YDS  

    **38 Beavers:** Z. Moss (RB – IND): 18.20 points – 12 CAR, 58 YDS, 1 TD, 5 REC, 39 YDS  

    **MikeMac7:** C. Lamb (WR – DAL): 15.57 points  4 REC, 47 YDS, 1 TD

If this matchup were a movie, it would be called *The Great Snoozefest*. Both teams looked like they were on autopilot, with only a few sparks of life. Joe Burrow finally remembered how to play quarterback, delivering a near-flawless performance and reminding everyone why he’s one of the best in the league. Zack Moss was a solid sidekick, contributing through both the ground and the air. MikeMac7, on the other hand, had CeeDee Lamb put in a decent shift, but with his QB (Anthony Richardson) throwing up a meager 5.08 points, it was a rough day at the office. The 38 Beavers won this one with minimal effort, and MikeMac7 is probably reevaluating life choices right about now.

5. **BBL Drizzy (wailatime) vs TSW (smoochiew123)**

   **Final Score: 101.40 – 81.90**

   **Top Players:**

     **BBL Drizzy:** K. Williams (RB – LAR): 30.60 points – 24 CAR, 89 YDS, 2 TD, 2 REC, 27 YDS  

     **BBL Drizzy:** J. Fields (QB – CHI): 18.40 points – 25/32 CMP, 245 YDS, 1 INT, 6 CAR, 49 YDS, 1 TD  

     **TSW:** B. Robinson (RB – ATL): 16.38 points – 16 CAR, 31 YDS, 1 TD, 2 REC, 21 YDS

BBL Drizzy came in ready to pop bottles, and Kyren Williams was the guest of honor at this fantasy party. The Rams’ back ran all over the competition, scoring twice and racking up nearly 90 yards on the ground. It was like watching a man run downhill—unstoppable. Meanwhile, Justin Fields contributed with his legs, reminding everyone that even when he’s bad through the air, he’s still dangerous on the ground. As for TSW, Bijan Robinson put in some decent work, but the rest of the team might as well have been on a staycation. With no other real contributors, TSW ended up limping to the finish line, while BBL Drizzy was cruising through with a celebratory dance.

6. **One Penny Ja’More (SamHolmberg) vs A’mon one (bohlsen01)**

   **Final Score: 132.10 – 95.62**

   **Top Players:**

  **One Penny Ja’More:** L. Jackson (QB – BAL): 25.98 points – 12/15 CMP, 182 YDS, 2 TD, 14 CAR, 87 YDS, 1 TD  

     – **One Penny Ja’More:** J. Chase (WR – CIN): 26.80 points – 7 REC, 151 YDS, 1 TD  

     – **A’mon one:** J. Allen (QB – BUF): 30.92 points – 23/30 CMP, 269 YDS, 4 TD, 8 CAR, 44 YDS

This one wasn’t close—One Penny Ja’More absolutely dismantled A’mon one. Lamar Jackson was out there looking like his 2019 MVP self, throwing two touchdowns and rushing for another. Not to be outdone, Ja’Marr Chase balled out, hauling in 151 yards and a touchdown as if it were backyard football. SamHolmberg’s team was clicking on all cylinders, making the matchup a brutal watch for A’mon one. Josh Allen gave his all, putting up 30.92 points with four touchdowns, but he was a one-man army in a battle he couldn’t win. The rest of bohlsen01’s squad might as well have been spectators. If Allen can’t get some help soon, it’s going to be a long, long season.

7. **Breezy Like Sunday Mornin (Jon7D) vs Dreier’s Laundromat (Dreierjd11)**

   **Final Score: 89.22 – 70.48**

   **Top Players:**

     – **Breezy Like Sunday Mornin:** J. Taylor (RB – IND): 26.00 points – 23 CAR, 110 YDS, 1 TD, 1 REC, 25 YDS  

     – **Dreier’s Laundromat:** A. Jones (RB – MIN): 23.30 points – 19 CAR, 102 YDS, 1 TD, 4 REC, 49 YDS  

This was the classic example of a game where one team didn’t even need to get out of second gear to secure the win. Jon7D rode the back of Jonathan Taylor all the way to an easy victory. Taylor was absolutely unstoppable, running through Dreierjd11’s imaginary defense like they were traffic cones. The Laundromat was so disorganized that even Aaron Jones’ respectable 23.30 points went completely to waste. Mahomes couldn’t save Dreierjd11 from the inevitable wash cycle they got caught in. When your WRs are showing up like ghosts (seriously, 4 points from Justin Jefferson?), you know you’re in trouble. In the end, Jon7D’s squad didn’t even break a sweat while Dreierjd11 is left wondering if they put their players on the spin cycle by accident.

8. **B.A. Got That Dope (BZillionaire) vs Daddy (mamba123)**

   **Final Score: 81.18 – 94.10**

   **Top Players:**

     **B.A. Got That Dope:** D.K. Metcalf (WR – SEA): 18.40 points – 4 REC, 104 YDS, 1 TD  

     **B.A. Got That Dope:** T. Etienne (RB – JAX): 10.50 points – 11 CAR, 60 YDS, 4 REC, 49 YDS  

     **Daddy:** C. Olave (WR – NO): 17.60 points – 6 REC, 86 YDS, 1 TD  

     **Daddy:** Z. Charbonnet (RB – SEA): 24.20 points – 18 CAR, 91 YDS, 2 TD, 2 REC, 16 YDS  

In a matchup that was much closer than the score suggests, Daddy’s squad pulled out a solid win thanks to the tag team efforts of C. Olave and Z. Charbonnet. While Olave played a solid game, it was Charbonnet who took this one home, dominating on the ground and finding the end zone twice. BZillionaire, on the other hand, found themselves staring into the abyss as DK Metcalf tried his best to keep things respectable with a big 104-yard performance and a touchdown. Unfortunately for B.A. Got That Dope, their running backs did not, in fact, “got that dope” this week. Etienne had a decent day but couldn’t carry the load on his own. Daddy strolled to a win with balanced production from his roster, while BZillionaire was left wondering if they need to start handing out energy drinks before the next game.

Week 3 was full of dominant performances, disastrous no-shows, and some surprising breakouts. TheJackOfHarts and ChefJeff absolutely crushed their opponents, while teams like Nacua Matata and Hill’s Hush Money barely put up a fight. Standouts like Josh Jacobs, Kyren Williams, and Ja’Marr Chase showed why they’re fantasy stars, while others, like Nacua Matata and Dreier’s Laundromat, need to rethink their strategies. With Week 4 around the corner, things are only going to get more intense. Stay tuned to see if Nacua Matata can find his way back from the dead and if anyone can stop the 38 BEAVERS steamroller!

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